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What is uuuuuup, my roleplaying starmonkey brothers? If you all up and got some beef with how I be playing Gamzee, lay the smackdown on me here! Anon is on, screening is on, IP logging is off. Or, if you'd rather share a motherfuckin' sopor pie with me privately, you can troll me at madcapjest on either AIM or Plurk.

( Mayfield General Info )

( Permissions )

( Regains )

( LALALA )

( action; 1338 Benny )

[phone; the morning after shroomfield]

[The great thing about consuming all that sopor in one sitting? He doesn't remember a thing about what happened to him the next morning, other than a few flashes here and there that he ignores.]

'Suuuuuuup, motherfuckers, is everyone being all back to normal yet? Uhhh...I am still pretty sure I didn't cull anyone, so if we can stop saying that now, that would just be the motherfuckin' bitchtits.

Anyway, does anyone know what the motherfuck a paper boy's supposed to all be at? Because the town says I'm one, but I ain't made out of paper. I think.

[Action]

[Somewhere around town, you may stumble across a large pile of collapsed monsters, ants and praying mantises and crabs alike. Cheerfully sitting on top of the heap, like a scene from a stereotypical shounen manga, is Gamzee, swinging his feet and affectionately patting the head of one of the crabs. Could this actually be a display of competence and badassery from the normally stupid clown? Has he had hidden depths all along?

Hahahaha, no. On closer inspection, there are traces of green slime around all of the defeated monsters' mouths, as well as discarded empty pie tins everywhere. From the way their limbs are languidly twitching, it quickly becomes obvious that none of the monsters are actually dead, just incredibly stoned. Don't ask how he managed to get a bunch of robots and empty costumes blazed out of their minds - he is just that good.]

[So it seems like there's been a lot of drama and hurt feelings lately! Gamzee doesn't really get it, but you know what's fun? Parties and dancing and getting to hang out with your friends all night are fun! Surely this will be a great way to cheer everyone up! And okay, there's some kind of weird human thing about only going to hiveapproaching dances with one person, but that does not sound like it would be as much fun as going with lots of people, so clearly humans just have no idea what they're talking about.]

Haha, so I guess the starmonkey dance is tomorrow? I heard you're all what only supposed to be going with a partner, but shit, that ain't sounding real fair to me for the motherfuckers that can't be finding one or wanna go with all their friends. Ain't cool for anyone to be left out, y'know?

So yeah, if any motherfucker out there still needs someone to go with, hit a brother up, honk! Let's get this motherfuckin' friend date show on the road. [beat, and then awkwardly because Gamzee has no idea how to filter anything ever but he wants to make sure his friend is okay] Feferi, you going?

[Action; inside 1338 Benny]

[Some people deal with teenage drama and fights with their best friends by drowning their sorrows in ice cream and shitty movies. Gamzee, on the other hand, drowns his sorrows in pies. Unfortunately, the human pies don't work half as well as his sopor ones do when it comes to making him feel better, plus his stomach starts hurting after he downs a whole tin for some reason. This hasn't stopped him from baking dozens and dozens of them, though.

Anyone who comes into the kitchen of 1338 Benny will find Gamzee covered head to toe in flour, as well as what looks to be a minor explosion of various ingredients all over the countertops, including several that have no business being anywhere near a pie. The table, meanwhile, is stacked with piping hot pies. If this were one of Karkat's paleromcoms, this would be the incredibly pathetic scene where Gamzee starts wailing the lyrics to "All By Myself (Don't Wanna Be Culled Anymore)" at the top of his lungs.]

[Action; outside 1338 Benny]

[Having been scolded by both drone parents because 'boys shouldn't be doing girly activities like baking', Gamzee has relocated his table of pies outdoors and is currently munching on a slice. Taped across the table is a large sign that reads:

Gamzee looks kind of lonely, come share a slice with him? There's three different types of pies to choose from:

1) Regular pies: through the power of miracles, Gamzee has actually managed to bake pies that most people would be familiar with, like apple and banana cream and cherry.

2) Stoner pies: the ingredients in these are kind of weird! You might get a strange but nonetheless delicious one, like peanut butter chocolate potato chips pie, or a pie filled with ice cream and soda. On the other hand, you might also get one with hamburger meat and strawberry syrup.

3) Pot pies: they look like normal pies, but Gamzee's added a special ingredient that the greasers at the high school said would make miracles happen. He's not sure how a bag full of what looks like grass is supposed to accomplish this, but humans can be pretty weird sometimes! Don't worry, there isn't enough pot in these pies to get anyone sick, just high.]

[Waking up in an unfamiliar place with no memory of how he'd gotten there is...actually not unusual in the least for Gamzee. In fact, waking up indoors period should be considered a success. He has no idea what this strange place is, but there seems to be a lot of clubs everywhere - maybe it's a subjugglator's throneroom?

Oh well. He doesn't need to know where he is, he's sure everything will work out just fine if he just sits back and waits for a miracle (ie Karkat) to find him. Ooh, those balls look really colorful and shiny, maybe he can try juggling a couple while he waits!

Gamzee attempts to pick up one of the bowling balls and then, not expecting how heavy it'd be, proceeds to drop it squarely on his foot.]

Honk!

[So with Jade having drunk one bottle of milk and Karkat two, Gamzee's finally managed to pay attention for long enough to put his foot down and demand that this morning's share be given to him. After all, with the mirthful messiahs watching over him, what's the worst that could happen?

The answer comes a few hours later. Gamzee's room, the living room, and the kitchen are in complete disarray, as if someone found a baseball bat and just clubbed the shit out of everything he saw. The troll in question, meanwhile, has managed to stop his rampage long enough to pick up one of the non-destroyed phones left.

Gamzee's voice sounds nearly unrecognizable from his usual drugged-out, dreamy tone; instead, it's sharp, abrupt, and furious, alternating between a low growl and an angry shout.]

You know, I be getting real motherfuckin' sick of this shit.

REAL MOTHERFUCKIN' SICK AS SHIT OF SEEING ALL MY MOTHERFUCKIN' FRIENDS KICK THE UNFUNNY BUSINESS NIGHT AFTER NIGHT.

Makes me get all my motherfuckin' sadness on to see them hurt like this.

MAKES ME WANNA MOTHERFUCKIN' BRING THE DARKEST OF ALL MOTHERFUCKIN' CARNIVALS DOWN ON THE SHITHIVE MOTHERFUCKERS WHAT BE MAKING ALL THIS ATROCIOUSNESS HAPPEN

until their heads burst like balloons filled with the brightest and harshest of motherfuckin' paint.

Honk.

HONK.

So.

MOTHERFUCKIN SO.

What the fuck are we gonna do about this?

[OOC: Gamzee's been hit by the hormone-free milk and will be snapping in and out of a milder version of his sober self (as well as other moods, but that has nothing to do with the milk, that's just Gamzee). He's still relatively sane though, so he's not going to try attacking anyone...not that it'd be very effective anyway since he's still a thirteen year old human.]

[ACTION; morning all around Mayfield]

[Sadly, Gamzee has not yet acquired his trademark face-paint, as the stores refuse to sell make-up to a boy and he's too stupid to lie about it being for his girlfriend. Kanaya had offered to buy it for him, but then she got panscrubbed and now she just giggles at him and tells him to stop joking when he tries to bring it up. BUT GAMZEE IS A DETERMINATOR. HE IS MAKING THIS HAPPEN.

So it's back to plan A. After extensively studying the fashion sense and styles of the pink starmonkeys (aka staring at them in slack-jawed wonder), Gamzee has managed to come to the conclusion that the females wear really long shirts and no pants. He's ~~stolen~~ borrowed some clothes from his drone mom, but didn't bother with her make-up since that's motherfuckin' blasphemy.

In short, there is now a gangly thirteen year old boy wobbling around town in high-heels and a dress that's too big for him, and occasionally tripping on the hems or the shoes and falling flat onto his face. Also, he's gotten himself lost.]

[ACTION; later that afternoon]

[SUCCESS. Having somehow acquired the necessary make-up, Gamzee's wearing his clown facepaint at last...and also still in the dress, since it hasn't occurred to him yet that he might want to take it off. He can now be found all over Mayfield, staring in hypnotized wonder at the glory that is his miracle modus.

Sorry, were you holding something? Gamzee's just going to absently try to snag it and make it disappear into a beautiful swirl of seizure-inducing rainbow cards.

Also, for anyone at 1338 Benny, most of your items have probably mysteriously vanished.]

[Phone]

Whooooooa. How are -- how are all these motherfuckin' voices be coming from this little tubething? Motherfuckin' miracles, man.

[There's a looooooong pause, and it seems like Gamzee might have wandered off and forgotten to hang up until he speaks up again.]

Uhhhhh...pretty sure my skin ain't all being pink last time I checked. 'Cept for that one time with the sweep-old pie. And I think I all up and lost my motherfuckin' horns.

[Action, 1338 Benny Street]

[Gamzee's just standing out on the lawn, staring out into his surroundings with a glazed look on his face, jaw half-open in amazement. Holy shit, he's out in the sun and it doesn't hurt, everything is so bright, holy shit there are so many pink starmonkeys walking around look at all the colors oh my gog everything is so beautiful]

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Gamzee Makara

July 2014

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HMD/OOC contact/Info
cr chart
sEvEn | AcTiOn, pHoNe
sIx | AcTiOn
fIvE | pHoNe
fOuR | aCtIoN
summer lovin' event | locked to foretastes
tHrEe; phone | forward-dated to friday the 19th
TwO | action
oNe | phone/action

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Page generated Jun. 14th, 2025 01:44 pm

Gamzee Makara

bard of...fuck, I forgot :o(

Recent Entries

HMD/OOC contact/Info

cr chart

sEvEn | AcTiOn, pHoNe

sIx | AcTiOn

fIvE | pHoNe

fOuR | aCtIoN

summer lovin' event | locked to foretastes

tHrEe; phone | forward-dated to friday the 19th

TwO | action

oNe | phone/action